Yesterday, I couldn’t stop thinking about someone who hurt me badly a few months ago. I hadn’t thought of this person in at least a month, and then BAM, I’m in it.
I know where this train of thought leads. It is not a happy place. My defenses tell me to ignore the memory. I listen. I try. I fail.
The memory comes roaring back, stronger than before. This repeats. It’s not as simple as just “ignoring” negative thoughts. How come?
Energy is the currency of my psyche. My attention is the bank distributing it. And my thoughts are gluttonous mercenaries whose martial art is judo. They feed on any energy routed to them by my attention, swelling up and working for or against me in direct proportion to how much they receive.
They are insatiable. It doesn’t matter whether they are useful or not. [Read more…] about Mercenaries